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"The 2004 offseason has been an absolute flurry so far, with big stories providing plenty of column fodder. From Colorado's (and Rochester's) coaching search to major player transactions to the news out of Kansas City, there has been much to chew on the past few weeks.
But despite everything going on, one word and one word alone has grabbed my attention more than any other. It runs through my mind, induces a little smirk and brings a twinge of anticipation formerly reserved for the long-anticipated return of our girl Jennifer Garner in "Alias" next month. The one word?

Cletus.

Yes, there have been several published reports that Clint Mathis will indeed be in Real Salt Lake kit for the 2005 season.

And I, for one, can't wait.

My name is Tino Palace, and I am a Cletus-aholic. There, I said it. No matter how many times he tears up a defense and then wears out his welcome, I still come back thirsting for more.

How do I explain the Legend of Cletus to those who may not be familiar? Take a bit of Gazza, add a bit of Mike Tyson, and mix it up good. And that, kids, is why I love him.

Yup, I'm the guy who still watches Tyson fight and I'm the guy who (while I knew it would have ended badly) wanted to see Gazza playing in MLS. Call me a sucker, but when people have tremendous talent -- I want to give them another chance to wow me.

Let's be honest, Cletus' wild roller-coaster of a career fits that train wreck mold, as in I just can't stop looking at it. He ropes you in with moments of brilliance and wonderment at how good he might become. And then he leaves you shaking your head at what could (and should) have been.

So what do I say to John Ellinger and RSL taking a shot on him? Bravo.

This league needs strikers, and good ones. A Golden Boot in MLS he has scored 52 times in MLS contests, including five in one game back in 2000. He has also proven he can score -- and do so in style -- on the grandest of stages as evidenced by his magnificent goal against South Korea in the 2002 World Cup.

But it says here the league doesn't just need strikers, it needs a touch of flamboyancy. MLS is a bit lacking in creative flare these days, and this guy has so much flare he could satisfy Jennifer Aniston's boss in "Office Space."

And even better, he's still in his late 20s, so this is not a player coming in for one last bite of the limelight before he hits the dog track. He's got plenty of goalkeepers (and, yes, probably bridges) still to burn.

Yeah, it's not all roses with Cletus. In between the flashes of brilliance he has his, um, moments. Yes, The Bruce has publicly questioned his work habits. Sure, a past MLS coach questioned his sanity. Yup, he did make a rather uncouth gesture at his coach for putting him in the game too late, and was subsequently banished to the bench.

But that's Cletus. Why does RSL want him? Because before he pulled the watch garbage in Hannover, he began his stay there by doing the other thing he is best known for -- torching defenses. And for any MLS team, much less an expansion side, that is a risk worth taking.

And so I am ready for another bout of my Cletus-aholism. Deep down in places I don't like to talk about, I hope that he goes to RSL, bangs in 25 goals, gets fined for drinking a beer on the bench after Ellinger pulls him too early one game, grows pony-tails like Latrell Sprewell, and dates the mayor's 18-year-old daughter. Okay, I don't know if the mayor has an 18-year-old daughter, but that would be so Cletus.

The kid is a Georgian gun-slinger, he lives by it and he dies by it. When he is on form, he is a swashbuckling, enterprising footballer with a creative flare that few Americans can match. And when he is not, it all seems to go a bit pear-shaped.

And that is the Legend of Cletus. And why I will be watching a lot more RSL games if they bring him in and turn him loose -- if they just let Cletus be Cletus, on and off the pitch.

I do, however, fear that Salt Lake City may never be the same."
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